well, it's been quite awhile not doing what i should here. well who cares anyway. so um, today is the day. the day which i've set on my heart that i won't do those things. but, i did it. things turned out so badly. sooo under my expectations wah. promises that i have made have been broken... ? Adnin's home today finally. time flies so fast huh. it's quite unbelivable to see she's here. in that condition. nvm cuz' she is sure one tough cookie (: somehow.. i feel a little sad. to let things go. 'it's only growing pains dont you know? the only way to live is letting go' that part of a lyric of a song.. but i'm still here, not improving myself. im dissappointed. feels like i've gone too far. i've lost faith in Him. lost trust in myself. damn. this makes me feel like raining. okay. but, it is also unbeliavable to have people you actually love is actually around you and actually care about you haha. it's just that you didnt see how much they actually care bout you, and therefore you started making assumptions of this and that... haven't i talked craps enough? so anyways. this is MY LIFE after spm. this. is. it. it's soo hard anyone couldnt live in it. but i know, there are more people who are wayy less fortunate than me. waayy too hard- their lives. it's just that i have to believe that trials Allah gave to every individual is different. believe in that. yea yeah aini it's a common thing you'd here though. so, i'm soo old and grey. and dull. idk, just feels like saying those to myself. i feel like i wanna keel myself and humilate me extremely bad. k, enough. i need You, Ya Rabbi.
just so lame.
grow up and live in reality, will yah